virtualDavis

Ever have that feeling that you’re late to the party? Like everyone’s already had a cocktail and an appetizer or two, and then you stroll in with your hair still wet from the shower and your shirt buttoned up crooked?

I’ve been feeling that a little bit lately. Especially while trying to decide whether or not to join Facebook. It rose rapidly and quickly eclipsed all equivalent social networking sites during the last couple of years that Susan and I renovated a pair of old buildings in Essex, NY. Prior to catching the residential rehabilitation bug — or at least prior to the last 3-4 years during which I’ve been 110% consumed with revitalizing five distressed buildings from the early 1800s and 1900s — I considered myself at least near the vanguard of the new media movement. No longer. While I blundered around in a dusty, plaster splattered purgatory, the wired world has catapulted forward. Now, fumbling around like a man blinded by sunlight after too long among the troglodytes, I’m trying to get my bearings. And there is no question; I’m very, very late to the party!

LinkedIn happened to be my first encounter. I was at Susan’s Hamilton College reunion a year and a half ago, and I met Dan Nye who was the much heralded CEO of LinkedIn at the time. He made a presentation about the service to fellow alumni, and by the time I connected with him that afternoon I’d already joined. The concept fascinated me, and his down-to-earth pitch and sharp wit convinced me to act. Since then, my LinkedIn profile has proven to be an invaluable networking tool.

Twitter was next. I’d toyed with it a couple of times before, mostly because it seemed simple and serendipitous. And because it was viable from Blackberry which was indispensable this last couple of years. But it also seemed frivolous during a time where I was rationing minutes for eating and sleeping. So it slipped. Until a few weeks ago when I posted my first tweet to virtualDavis on Twitter. I’m still a newbie for sure, but I’m having a blast. I’ve been really surprised by how quickly I’m connecting to all sorts of great tweeters, and frankly it was the incredibly welcoming atmosphere that I’ve experienced with Twitter that prompted me to take the Facebook plunge. It’s sort of ironic since the Twitter vs. Facebook debate surfaces so often online. For me, a great Twitter experience is what motivated to set up a virtualDavis on Facebook account. And they seem like totally complimentary services, each so totally niched and overdelivering w/in their niches.

So, last night I finally accepted an invitation to join Facebook and I’m off and running! I’m taking a little ribbing from friends who have mocked me for not getting on sooner, but it’s been in good spirits. And I’ve been overwhelmed with the positive response and with the number of friends who’ve quickly connected me. That tells me I’m lucky to have good friends, but it also serves as a gentle warning. These folks must be on Facebook all the time! I’ve been amazed at how instantaneous interaction is on Facebook, which makes me wonder how anyone gets anything else done… Late last night, I realized that I’ll have to learn how to close the browser and go to sleep!

To everyone who’s welcomed me into the 21st century, thank you!

It’s happened again, another memorable forward. Read these puns aloud, and you’ll likely chuckle a time or two. If not, check your pulse. And then ingest a goodly chunk of dark chocolate. Then reread these clever puns. Aloud. And enjoy!

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: ‘You stay here; I’ll go on a head..’
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: ‘Keep off the Grass.’
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said ‘No change yet.’
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
19. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a  seasoned veteran.
20. A backward poet writes inverse.
21. In a democracy it’s your vote that counts.  In feudalism it’s your count that votes.
22. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
23. Don’t join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!

Did these tickle your punny funny bone? Did they inspire to conjure up a pun or two of your own? Feel free to share.

Related articles

• Being punny. Making puns (good and bad) and bad jokes as I go is one of the ways that I am creative every day! I just make up jokes as I talk with friends or my sisters, and as I read, even when I’m doing schoolwork. It’s pretty simple: all you need is wo (actinglikeanimals.com)
• Puns (thefreelancenut.com)
• Fun Puns :) (thinkerslot.wordpress.com)
• Puns Are Pun-ishing (earlbrussell.wordpress.com)
• Bad puns (meangreenmath.com)
• There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did. (brianbarrons.typepad.com)

This was simply too, too good to send off to the recycling bin without sharing the chuckle. If you’ve spent time in China — and maybe even if you haven’t — you’ll appreciate an email that was forwarded to me today. It’s one of those *clever* dispatches that asks you to read something and then scroll down until an image appears. So, some of the lead-up vanishes here, but the image says it all.

“If you can’t find the book you want, you’re probably shopping at the…” 

Hmmm… Bad karma? Coincidence? A bit uncanny that the same afternoon I chose to join the mad tweeting crowd the system got bogged down. Here’s the message that greeted me this evening:

“Twitter is over capacity. Too many tweets! Please wait a moment and try again.”

Uh-oh! And a moment later I tried again. Still the little twitter birds were hauling the whale over tossing seas. And again a moment after that. The blurring was a cross between seasickness and a gentle, prolonged belly laugh. I can explain neither.

Now — a leisurely shower later — the system seems to have restored itself. For now.

Spent several hours at Shelburne Orchards yesterday with bride, dog and friends. Actually, we were supposed to be at Champlain Orchards for the Harvest Celebration with food and live music, but I botched the plans. Somehow had it in my head that the event was at Shelburne Orchards instead and had everyone ride across on the ferry and meet just up the road from Charlotte instead of heading down to Shoreham.

Needless to say, there was plenty of food, sunshine and fun to be had and we enjoyed ourselves despite my brain sabbatical. The eating was great! I had a pork sausage with grilled peppers and onions with cider and some of Susan’s pumpkin soup. And for dessert, a delicious twist on apple crisp called Apple Betty, and described to me by the girl carrying the pie in the photo as, “All the comfort, with none of the committment.” For some reason the name One-Eyed Betty lodged in my brain… And that pie? Enormous. A couple of feet across at least! With a nifty old pickup parading across the crust. (FYI, the red clad pie carrier is Nick Cowles, owner/operator of Shelburne Orchards.)

Somebody with a bit too much time on their hands mashed up a PowerPoint presentation with a slew of photos garnered from the web during the past year. These are a few of my favorites. Apparently they were all voted on by someone somewhere, but that information had been expunged by the time it trickled down to me via a local friend. Some duds (cute kittens, etc.) but in general, this is a fun way to dally away a couple of minutes. If you’re interested, download the Top Photos of 2008 pps file and enjoy.

Lincoln & Darwin

Today is the bicentennial of Charles Darwin’s and Abraham Lincoln’s birthdays. The scientist and the politician both challenged the thinking and beliefs of their time, and each changed the modern world in vital, irreversible ways. (Despite the efforts of some!)

President Obama Spoke at the Lincoln Bicentennial Celebration, and much inevitably is being made of the Obama-Lincoln link. And Darwin too is much in the spotlight these recent years, especially as some religious zealots continue to call into question the science of evolution. So much and so little have changed in two centuries.

In poking around a bit, I’ve discovered two savory morsels:

“Charles Darwin’s trip on HMS Beagle was as a self-financed gentleman, a companion to the 26-year-old captain Robert Fitzroy.”

And, although Honest Abe was a fan and frequent quoter of William Shakespeare, Darwin scoffed, “I have tried lately to read Shakespeare and found it so intolerably dull that it nauseated me.”

Feelings exuberant as I dip my calloused fingers into the keys and let them wander around, words dribbling across the screen, reminding me that writing — at least at this basic level — has not abandoned me altogether. Neglected for so long, it’s a wonder!

For two and a half years essentially all of my productive output was eclipsed by home renovation. A scary admission, to be sure, but more easily voiced now that I’ve reemerged, now that I’m struggling back into the mainstream. Ever since January my wife and I have been concentrating on closure, whether finishing furnishing and hanging art or threatening legal recourse for contractors who’ve still failed to complete aspects of their work. And it’s working. Work has morphed into home. The beehive of tradesmen are gone, and a sun filled, almost finished home is ours to enjoy.

A bit uncanny that my last posting, “Hear a Little Music, Read a Little Poetry” is what we’ve been relearning lately. Time to slow down and savor the fruits of our labors. Sounds remotely dishonest to claim that we’ve had to relearn this, but it’s actually true. De-programming the habits we adapted to survive. Part of my unwinding will be a return to virtualDavis and e-Marginalia as well as several other new projects that I’ll share soon. Aaahhh… Glad to be back!

At last, I’m returning to this long overdue update to virtualDavis! I’m resuming the process of migrating old content over to the new server, CMS, theme, etc. I know, I know, I first promised this update in April 2007! But between then and now my life was kidnapped by the folly of follies: renovating our new home on Lake Champlain.

W.D. Ross House, Essex, NY (c. 1822)

Recounting this epic adventure is my next challenge… But more on that later. Please don’t expect an overnight website transformation, but I will stumble through some of the most overdue updates ASAP. Patience and time will reveal the new and improved virtualDavis. I promise…

Related articles

• Sally Lesh & Hyde Gate

  ---